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American Dream Serialization (Early Chapters)
Introduction to Jim Chaffee's Studies in Mathematical Pornography by Maurice Stoker
Introduction to Jim Chaffee's Studies in Mathematical Pornography by Tom Bradley
Studies in Mathematical Pornography: American Dream Title Page by Jim Chaffee
Studies in Mathematical Pornography: Chapter 1 by Jim Chaffee
Studies in Mathematical Pornography: Chapter 2 by Jim Chaffee
Studies in Mathematical Pornography: Chapter 3 by Jim Chaffee
Studies in Mathematical Pornography: Chapter 4 by Jim Chaffee
Studies in Mathematical Pornography: Chapter 5 by Jim Chaffee
Studies in Mathematical Pornography: Chapter 6 by Jim Chaffee
Studies in Mathematical Pornography: Chapter 7 by Jim Chaffee
Studies in Mathematical Pornography: Chapter 8 by Jim Chaffee
Studies in Mathematical Pornography: Chapter 9 by Jim Chaffee
01-01-2015
Modern Tragedy, or Parodies of Ourselves by Robert Castle
01-11-2014
Totally Enchanté, Dahling by Thor Garcia
01-04-2014
Hastini by Rudy Ravindra
The Satyricon of Petronius Arbiter Volume 5 Translation by W. C. Firebaugh
01-01-2014
Unexpected Pastures by Kim Farleigh
10-01-2013
Nonviolence by Jim Courter
The Satyricon of Petronius Arbiter Volume 4 Translation by W. C. Firebaugh
07-01-2013
The Poet Laureate of Greenville by Al Po
The Apocalypse of St. Cleo, Part VI by Thor Garcia
The Satyricon of Petronius Arbiter Volume 3 Translation by W. C. Firebaugh
04-01-2013
The Apocalypse of St. Cleo, Part V by Thor Garcia
The Apocalypse of St. Cleo, Part IV by Thor Garcia
The Satyricon of Petronius Arbiter Volume 2 Translation by W. C. Firebaugh
01-01-2013
The Apocalypse of St. Cleo, Part I by Thor Garcia
The Apocalypse of St. Cleo, Part II by Thor Garcia
The Apocalypse of St. Cleo, Part III by Thor Garcia
The Satyricon of Petronius Arbiter Volume 1 Translation by W. C. Firebaugh
10-01-2012
DADDY KNOWS WORST: Clown Cowers as Father Flounders! by Thor Garcia
RESURRECTON: Excerpt from Breakfast at Midnight by Louis Armand
Review of The Volcker Virus (Donald Strauss) by Kane X Faucher: Excerpt from the forthcoming Infinite Grey by Kane X Faucher
01-07-2012
Little Red Light by Suvi Mahonen and Luke Waldrip
TEXECUTION: Klown Konfab as Killer Kroaked! by Thor Garcia
Miranda's Poop by Jimmy Grist
Paul Fabulan by Kane X Faucher: Excerpt from the forthcoming Infinite Grey by Kane X Faucher
01-04-2012
Operation Scumbag by Thor Garcia
Take-Out Dick by Holly Day
Patience by Ward Webb
The Moon Hides Behind a Cloud by Barrie Darke
The Golden Limo of Slipback City by Ken Valenti
01-01-2012
Chapter from The Infinite Atrocity by Kane X. Faucher
Support the Troops By Giving Them Posthumous Boners by Tom Bradley
01-10-2011
When Good Pistols Do Bad Things by Kurt Mueller
Corporate Strategies by Bruce Douglas Reeves
The Dead Sea by Kim Farleigh
The Perfect Knot by Ernest Alanki
Girlish by Bob Bartholomew
01-07-2011
The Little Ganges by Joshua Willey
The Invisible World: René Magritte by Nick Bertelson
Honk for Jesus by Mitchell Waldman
01-04-2011
Red's Dead by Eli Richardson
The Memphis Showdown by Gabriel Ricard
Someday Man by John Grochalski
01-01-2011
I Was a Teenage Rent-a-Frankenstein by Tom Bradley
Only Love Can Break Your Heart by Fred Bubbers
10-01-2010
Believe in These Men by Adam Greenfield
The Magnus Effect by Robert Edward Sullivan
Performance Piece by Jim Chaffee
07-01-2010
Injustice for All by D. E. Fredd
The Polysyllogistic Curse by Gary J. Shipley
How It's Done by Anjoli Roy
Ghost Dance by Connor Caddigan
Two in a Van by Pavlo Kravchenko
04-01-2010
Uncreated Creatures by Connor Caddigan
Invisible by Anjoli Roy
One of Us by Sonia Ramos Rossi
Storyteller by Alan McCormick
01-01-2010
Idolatry by Robert Smith
P H I L E M A T O P H I L I A by Traci Chee
They Do! by Al Po
Full TEX Archive
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Application For The Chaparral Writers Society

By John-Ivan Palmer

Please see enclosed application for membership.

Dear Chaparral Writer's Society: I've always wanted to be a writer. Do you think I could publish this? I'm concerned it may not have enough dialogue. And my apologies for any punctuation errors. I hope it won’t be held against me. I welcome criticism of any kind. You can also reach me by phone. Thank you very much and I remain,
Sincerely Yours,
William Richter

Here's a sample of my writing you requested:

Sheep Shears
By William Richter

I used to go to church every goddamn week. Then one Sunday I sat in the front pew and played with a sheep shears. They kicked me out and said I had to change my ways. Fuck 'em. I went over to the minister's house and knocked on his door and when his wife answered I threw her ass to the floor, pulled up her skirt to see what she had, shaved her goddamn head with a sheep shears, and wrote "whore" across her scalp. [Do I need a comma after "shears"?] They called the cops and sent me to some shrink, and when he asked me what the hell was wrong, I kicked him in the nuts, then ran out to his waiting room, threw down his receptionist, pulled own her pants to see what she had, and shaved her fucking head too.

Then I went out for some lunch at a fancy restaurant and made the waiter bring me lots of food. When he gave me the bill I put my finger down my throat and barfed it all up and said no thanks. I went to my neighbor's house where they had a high fence to keep in their dog. The bitch was in heat. I jumped the fence, shaved the mutt with a shears and wrote "whore" all over it's skin and turned it loose. Packs of stray dogs wanted to fuck it. But I fucked it first.

I went into a flower shop and took a piss in a vase of roses and some motherfucker tried to stop me. I kicked him in the nuts, then sheared off his beard and told him to have a nice day.

Now I'm in jail. But I'm glad I'm in fucking jail. I'm having lots of goddamn fun here, meeting all kinds of people who understand me. But I won't be here long. When I get my ass out I’ll come looking for you. Yes, you! I'm going to shave your head with a sheep shears and write "whore" all over your scalp, then I'm going to shave your goddamn dog (or sheep or cow) and fuck it. So remember me, my name is William Richter. Have a nice day!

THE END

Henry Moore, Three-Way Piece No. 1: Points, Nelson-Atkins Museum of Art

© John-Ivan Palmer 2009